May 12 dilemma...

First, I want to say that I married the most wonderful man on the planet. Today is our 6 month anniversary and he gave me just what I wanted: a rock. I've been saying for weeks now that if you get paper on your 1 year wedding anniversary then surely a rock would be appropriate for the half-way-point. And I'm not talking about a diamond, for all you girls who are hearing the song "Diamonds are a girl's best friend" in the back of your mind. I really and truly mean a simple rock. So this morning, while he patiently waits for me to primp for church (since it's warm enough to actually wear a cute outfit), Marc picks out a nice melon-sized rock and tells me that he's going to carve it for me. I can hear you all now, awww. I know, I picked a good one.

Now, the real reason I'm writing is because I need your help. I have a birthday dilemma. This year, my special day happens to fall on the weekend of the infamous Whole Earth Festival. Every year we attend this festival and enjoy gathering with numerous local hippies from Northern California. It's a great family atmosphere: lots of fun music, drumming, great food, and hands-on workshops to learn skills like belly-dancing, bio-diesel, and building with cobb. It's free, so it's one of the easiest festivals to attend. Not only do we enjoy all of the aforementioned activities at Whole Earth Festival, but festivals like this are some of the easiest ways to connect with the traveling kids that we reach out to. In reality, it isn't just a fun festival, it's an outreach opportunity.

When I've been to Whole Earth Festival in the past, we all took our tents and camped out in our friend Levi's backyard. It wasn't all that bad, seeing as how he had a pool, hot tub, and guest-house for families to stay in. We had a total blast, fire-dancing and juggling, swimming and barbequeing. But, sadly, Levi doesn't live there anymore so this year we are spreading out and finding places to stay at various friends' houses in Sacramento. I totally love our friends in Sac-town, but you'd have to see their itsy-bitsy houses to understand: they don't realistically have room for families. (They pretty much have one bedroom houses and their toddlers sleep in hallways or closets) You could put an inflatable mattress on their living room floor, but then their toddlers and babies are light sleepers so you have to be very quiet until they get up. Not to mention the fact that we have a couple of single people who are hopefully going to be able to stay with them.

So the first part of the dilemma is that I don't foresee a very comfortable place for us to stay. And the second part is: I feel like a princess on my birthday and I want to be treated like one. I admit, this attitude makes me feel very selfish and I totally slip into comparison mode: Rachel celebrates her wedding anniversary at a festival every year and she doesn't complain a bit. Despite the fact that Rae and I always talk about how destructive it is to compare yourself to other people, I always fall into the trap! So the bottom line is: I am not very excited about spending my birthday on the road to Sacramento, celebrating with who-knows-what kind of dinner (with our friends or not?) and then sleeping on someone's couch, floor, or in a tent in their backyard.

Now, we could go to Steve and Louise's for my birthday (which is also Mother's Day weekend). That would be great. But then would we drive 3 hours the next day to Sacramento for the same sleeping dilemma? Or would we skip the whole festival? (I would feel extremely selfish) I think that I just want to go out to a nice romantic dinner with the love of my life (and have a comfortable, private bed to sleep in). Is that too much to ask? Probably not.

Do you know what I think the real dilemma is? Now that I'm married and pregnant, I am becoming more high-maintenance. I know I was usually the most high-maintenance girl on tour, because I was always the one to ask if we could spend a few extra minutes at the truck stop so I could take a shower every few days. But it's definitely gotten worse since that blessed day, October 23rd. I just don't seem to have the grace to sleep anywhere, go without showers for days on end, or have no privacy. And that bothers me, mostly because of the dumb comparison game again. It seems like most of the married people here don't need as much time, privacy, and amenities as I/we need. Anyway, I don't know what I'm asking for. Ultimately it is our decision as to how we will spend May 12, but maybe I just want a bit of advice, wisdom, or encouragement. Tell me if I'm being selfish or if I just know my needs and my boundaries. It's a tough call, but I'm open to your thoughts...